Dating Deal Breakers

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We all have them, even the most open minded of us. In my world I call them “deal breakers”. Ya know, those things about a person you just can’t overlook no matter how funny, charming or seemingly-witty they are. After much consideration I’ve decided to share this list with you in hopes that I can save just one person from wasting their precious time on someone that is clearly not in the same fabulous league as you.

  1. Not having a job – now, this may seem like a given to most of you but I have this huge heart that tends to look past little (okay, HUGE) red flags of a person’s outward possession to see the “truly great person they are” beneath all that. My motto might as well have been, “No job? No problem!” Thankfully my recent experiences have shown me the error of my ways. No, I will not pay your bills!

2. No car – again, a seemingly no brainer and I could spit you some pseudo-hippie b.s. about how bicycling around town is more eco-friendly blah blah blah. Fact of the matter is how can you pick me up for a date if you don’t have a car? And I refuse to ride on the handlebars — or in your little pink basket. It clashes with my dress and stilettos (Who am I kidding? I can’t afford stilettos!).

3. Bad teeth – Austin Powers may have been able to pull off the yellow, throwing-up-gang-signs in his mouth look but for the rest of the world this is just unacceptable. A smile is one of the first things I look at in a person. If you can offend me without uttering a word I’m going to walk away. Fast!

4. Baby-momma-drama – being a single parent myself I understand that there can sometimes be complications between you and your ex-significant other, especially when it comes to your kid(s). But guess what? I don’t care! And I definitely don’t want to hear about it over the first, second, third, or…who am I kidding…any date.

5. The work out-aholic – Look, I’ll be the first to admit, I can be completely superficial at times and I’m more attracted to those that keep themselves healthy and in shape. But do I care about it being “leg day” or the supplements you take before/during/after? No. Save that conversation for your bros. And don’t utter a word about my peanut butter obsession or tell me how unhealthy my cheesecake brownie lunch was. Don’t. Go. There.

6. Pet names – don’t even get me started…if we’ve been dating anything less than 6 months I will literally vomit if you call me “princess” or “babe.” I have a name. Please use it.

Those are just a few of my pet peeves when it comes to dating. Granted, no one is perfect and I understand there are always extenuating circumstances as to why you may be “in between jobs/cars/dental work” but do us all a favor, stay home until you get your life together. No one has time to work all the pieces out for you.

Save time…see it my way,

– Searching Stella

(Photo Credit: New Line Cinema)

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