This hot and steamy dirty deed story comes from Rico (similar to Rico Suave — or so he thinks). Rico had the opportunity to “hook up” (we use that term loosely) with a friend’s ex one random night and he took full advantage of the situation.
30th birthday parties are always wild. You don’t want to get older. You don’t want your 20s to end. You wonder if you’ll be single forever and so on and so forth. This party was no different. How do we cope with these questions?
SHOTS! Shots after shots after shots were had and my judgement went out the window. After hanging out with the boys for a while, some ladies joined our party. One of them was a buddy’s ex-girlfriend — who I had always had a thing for (in the sense that I wanted to rip her clothes off…not date her). After shot No. 10 (or 20 but really who can count at this point?!), his ex gave me the come hither eyes and I knew I had to have her.
Lets just say it had been a very long, dry nine months for me and those eyes said all I needed to know. I drug her back to my car all the while thinking…
“God, it’s been so long. I’m finally getting laid. I cannot ******* wait.”
It’s about 3 a.m. and we start making out in the backseat of the car. We all know what should happen next — but this went a little differently than you’d expect. The ex started rubbing herself all against me like a maniac and boy was I enjoying it. I rip her top off. I rip her bra off.
“It’s about to happen. I am finally going to have sex again.”
I rip her pants off and throw them in the front seat. I felt like I was in high school again. I went to remove her panties and she stopped me.
“I can’t do this,” she says.
WHAT?! You let me get this far and that’s it. So, I did something I am not proud of. Since I knew I wasn’t going to get laid, I decided to go back in time to when I was 16 and just let her rub on me. That’s right, you heard me correctly. No insertion whatsoever. The old dry hump move.
I started rubbing her faster and faster against me until…well I’ll spare you the dirty (literally) deets. I quickly regained my composure and bolted before she could see exactly what had happened to my pants. Lets just say I had to miss brunch the next day because I needed to do my laundry.
Reliving the past isn’t always a bad thing!
Keepin’ it classy,
(Do you have a dating story? We’d love to hear from you! Send your stories to email@example.com and we’ll include you in an upcoming blog. As always, you’ll be anonymous!)