Everyone has different ideas on what it’s like to fall in love. I recently began reading Chuck Kolsterman’s Killing Yourself to Live and while the entire book has blown me away, so far it was this particular segment that focuses on love – both past and future ones – that grabbed my heart and has stuck with me ever since.
“We all have the potential to fall in love a thousand times in our lifetime. It’s easy. The first girl l ever loved was someone I knew in sixth grade. Her name was Missy; we talked about horses. The last girl I love will be someone I haven’t even met yet, probably. They all count. But there are certain people you love who do something else; they define how you classify what love is supposed to look like. These are the most important people in your life, and you’ll meet maybe four or five of these over the span of 80 years. But there’s still one more tier to all this; there is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually happens retrospectively, but it happens eventually. This is the one person who unknowingly sets the template for what you will always love about other people, even if some of these lovable qualities are self-destructive and unreasonable. The person who defines your understanding of love is not inherently different than anyone else, and they’re often just the person you happen to meet the first time you really, really want to love someone. But that person still wins. They win, and you lose. Because for the rest of your life, they will control how you feel about everyone else.”
– Chuck Klosterman, Killing Yourself to Live
(Photo Cred: Dhilong Kirat, Flickr)